Sullen v.5



Thoughts on a Saturday Evening

Saturday, June 28, 2008

Tonight I made a last minute decision to *not* go out with my friends afterall. Tristan Prettyman's music (mostly music from her older cd) has been growing on me; however, my subscription to napster apparently means nothing because it will still only allow me to download/listen 30 second clips! Fed up with only 30 seconds, and the music not being available on LimeWire (yes, occasionally I download music from LimeWire. Oh well.), I decided to not go out and instead haul my butt down to the local music store -- 10 minutes before close -- to purchase her new cd.

I arrived to the music stroe just in time to purchase her new cd. To make my night even better, I rented this random $1 movie from this "Redbox" system outside of Walgreens. I don't even know what movie I purchased. All I know is that I was nervous about the transient standing nearby to the Redbox system and I decided that it didn't matter what movie I got. I just wanted back in my car asap and decided I'd be happy with whatever movie came out of the Redbox.

I also discovered that macaroni, applesauce, and Corona with lime (a 7 oz bottle -- I love these tiny bottles! How have I not discovered them sooner?!) is apparently the best meal ever. I know, it sounds disgusting, but it's everything I'm in the mood for tonight. What can I say. Haha.

I think the only thing that could really ruin my night is if that *disgusting* spider decided to reveal itself again. I missed when I tried killing it the first time, two days ago. I never was able to find it after I missed, despite ripping apart my room and rearranging all of the furniture (in a matter of 2 minutes) to see where it could be hiding. *shudder*

This is the state of my mind tonight. Last week's workload was a bit traumatic. Most of the work week involved wine and "team building". It's *because* of team building and missing two full days at my job that I'm going to have the same type of horrible overload this upcoming week. Sometimes I wonder if everyone in their serious full-time job is as overwhelmed as I am. I don't know if it's supposed to get easier or if I just haven't adjusted to the 'real world' yet. I'm glad I'm not bored, but I feel like I'm back in high school (in my mind high school was more difficult than college--strangely enough--probably due to the standards I held myself to) with the type of panic/stress I feel regarding deadlines. Maybe it's just marketing/projet management (both of which I do) that are ultra stressful.

This past week was a little bit of hell... hence why I'm staying in tonight and not going out (again). I need some serious time to regroup and prepare for this upcoming week. I feel sad when I realize that I'm looking forward to a 4-day holiday (July 3rd-6th) as a good opportunity to catchup on work.

I feel privileged to have the opportunity to work on what I do, and *where* I do. As my 'boss' would say, I'm in a 'high profile' job. Other people who have been in the company for a long time worked their way into the position that I'm in now. I'm still a bit dumbfounded about how I managed to get this job -- plopped right into it without any prior experience with the company and/or serious marketing. I'm learning a lot, but man it's stressful. I see it leading to great things in my future, so I'm happy to put in my time now, but it really is just exhausting and even frightening sometimes (there's a lot of room for error). On top of it all, I haven't given up freelance webdesign work or going out with friends -- all of these things combined have led me to a minor meltdown tonight i.e. Corona.. Mac&Cheese.. applesauce.. Tristan Prettyman... .... and a random movie.