Sullen v.5



seems like I'm running, but I'm not even moving

Sunday, August 06, 2006

A weird thing happened when I graduated -- I lost about 98% of my interest in blogging. I still think it's important to do, so I will, but I can't say that I've felt very inspired to write about anything random or not-so-random in the past months; however, there is still plenty of both. Developments over the past months have been interesting. I suppose I could call this my first "real job" (working about 50+ hrs. every week), but in many ways I feel like I've had plenty of other "real jobs" that were simply less hrs (which I would like to get back to at some point, hopefully sooner than later). Since I've been with this company (my 3 mo. anniversary coming up any day now), they have seen a center-in-the-dark go to number-one-center-carrying-the-region. There are many centers throughout the Southern California region, and since I've been in my position as a directoer, my particular center has gone from just-hangin-in-there to CARRYING my center's numbers. Someone more informed than me about how things work on a whole (the other director in my center who is still in the process of training me), said that if it weren't for our center the region's numbers would "tank." Needless to say, I am feeling pretty proud. The other director informed me that "this is largely impart due to your performance in sales, and you should be very proud." Anyway. I wish I could be happier in my position, but the truth is I really am not. I think my number one gripe is the compensation. Here I am making bank for this business, and I very simply don't see the bank I should get in return. The work itself is rewarding, and for a good cause, but I can't help but still feel frustrated due to lack of compensation due to *knowing* what I'm worth and knowing they aren't giving it to me, and knowing what it costs to live in Southern California. Anyway. That is that. I spoke to the region manager and she said I am on the "fast track to promotion," and I am just going to have a little more faith in her words before I decide to move on. Currently I am in the stage of running the center independently (need this explain more why I am demanding increased compensation?), and if I can continue to stay consistent in my performance, then there is no reason I shouldn't be promoted soon.
sigh. anyway. It's still very frustrating.
I cannot say how fantastic it continues to be to have my friends still around me. I love hanging out with them on a regular basis, and just this past weekend I invited a large group of friends to come hang with me in La Jolla (a house in-the-family is there). It was a fantastic short trip and I think everyone had a great time. Snorkeling.. beaching it up.. a little bar fun... it was nice. Everyone met my dad. I love when people who are important to me get to meet my family. It's also very important for me to see how those people get along with my dad (my mom too, but she wasn't at the house this weekend). On a somewhat-side-note, this (meeting my dad) is also one of the things I look for in a guy. Ha. Yeah, they have to be (or appear to be) pretty confident and relaxed when speaking with him. He's an easy guy to get along with, but I want any guy I date to really be able to respect my dad and get along with him on a personal level. If a guy tries at all, it's not very hard to do.. but some won't even try, or they shy away. So yeah, it's just a side note, because I don't think I've ever written in my blog how really important that is to me. A guy generally gets very good points in my book if he can initiate talk with my dad, stay interested, and not even stay interested for my sake, but because they genuinely want to develop a relationship. Maybe "relationship" isn't the right word, but they appear to be invested in someone further than me who is very important in my eyes. And of course, if I have any interest in that guy, I too want my dad to see them for the great person they are.. and that can only happen if (preferably) the guy makes some effort.. or my dad makes the initial effort and the guy really goes with it. Haha. Crazy analyzation there, but I can bet the same thing is important to a lot of other girls.. so guys... take note. :P