Sullen v.5




Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Whatever I post in this blog changes things. I'm not complaining about it, because whatever I post in this blog I expect "whoever" to read (even the people I may be most embarrassed to have read)... anyway.. just saying this.. because it seems the minute I post about something that I'm concerned about or have on my mind... odd things start to change, as-if these people read my blog. lol. I know it's not true (although it would be easy-enough), but it only further supports some weird back-of-my-mind thought that maybe nothing around me really is-what-it-is and I'm just creating my own reality according to some pre-meditated lucid dream (like Vanilla Sky). A crazy thought, but just a thought.

For example: walked into the bank yesterday, and banker-guys (two particular flirty ones) completely ignored me and actually seemed kind of cold! It was an amazing turn of events and I wondered what was the cause, but I'm not complaining. :) Maybe because I was dressed in grubby clothes, paint splashed on my arms, and a visor riding low on my face, but I'd be stupid to say that they didn't recognize me. Interesting.

Office-situation not a big deal afterall since I've had some time to think about it and realize how trivial it is - not a problem. It is what it was/may-be. I played it cool today and waved from my car as I drove up and they were walking out, and felt shunned, no biggie. hahaha... oh man. Considering the other person is exactly like me in a lot of ways (which is weird w/ the consideration of sun signs - this person born only a day before my b-date) .. I'm sure they have the same thoughts that I'm having right now.. which means they're thinking keep it on the DL and we don't have to deal with it right now/if-ever. lol. ahh whatever.

ok I'm out. haha.. I'm in a really giggly mood and find my ISSUES utterly ridiculously pathetically funny. I'm glad I can look at it that way, atm.