Sullen v.5



dumb dumb dumb.

Friday, June 10, 2005

ugh. I am so *dumb* sometimes when it comes to listening to my instincts. I've been told, and actually do feel, that I'm semi-psychic.. not in the crazy fortune-telling way (which I'm not sure even exists), but in *sensing* things. . and how I can get a good read on people usually. People have generally told me too that I have a gift for 'helping' with advice (and maybe why so many people are always coming to me with their drama.. and I don't say that in a negative way, because honestly I don't mind), which sometimes makes me consider the clinical aspect of psychology.. but then again it's not something I would want to do for a career/money.
There's this joke (kind of) that I make with guys.. that I "judge them by their hair", and when they ask me to give my honest impression of them by their hair, and I'm comfortable enough to offer it (haha, and I usually won't bother analyzing if there are some negative/confusing things..) they're usually surprised by how right I get it. The truth is though, it's not just their hair probably, but being able to make good assessments.

anyway. rambling!

What I'm *trying* to get at... is that I can seemingly *sense* things, strongly. So last night, when I felt "really nervous".. and was using words like "freaked out".. that should have been a huge RED LIGHT for me to NOT go. I even expressed just cutting off my plans last night because of how I felt.... *unfortuantely* I told myself that I was being ridiculous because I'm normally not so nervous, and went. . .
blah! The night pretty much started off terrible from the beginning. Jo's friends were kind enough to buy us drinks (then again most guys are), and shortly thereafter Jo* pulled me aside and told me that one of her friends requested that she put in a "good word" for him. blaaaaaah. my god. I already suspected it, but then knew for sure after she told me that... it was going to be a *long* night because I wanted nothing better than to get the hell out of there. While he was cool..friendly.. whatever.. I was definitely *NOTTTTT* interested.. way too much *negative* energy around him. Like the covertist (word?) kind... the kind that some really naieve girl might not catch up on and later find themselves in a bad situation. anyway anyway anyway. I thought it kind of funny that the other day I expressed myself as "cute with all things added up," and that this guy was now telling me, "so.. you're gorgeous.." ... I really just wanted to run the hell out of that place, but I had no place to go.. and JO.. my god.. Jo is really cool and will usually look out for me, but last night she really needed to take a hint and help me out! Now I know how Cait* felt when she came out with me to meet up with Davi* and she accidentally ended up having to hang out with Davi's friend (who wasn't creepy, but she wasn't interested)... I am so sorry now. Anyway. To make a frickin' long story short, I had to take matters into my own hand when he definitely invaded my space.. then he tripped.. tried to catch himself.. fell.. and he was thrown out of the bar. hahahaha. Maybe the bouncers/God were looking out for me, because they showed up half a second later after this guy fell down (my friend said, "wow I've never seen someone thrown out of a bar before for tripping").. and I was so very thankful.