Sullen v.5



I should be sleeping.

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

(wrote yesterday, posting now..)
I survived another year. Heh. Around finals week I always think it might just be too much and I won't be able to handle it, but somehow I always have got by. Now I am looking at one last year until I graduate, and then it is done! Man.. it feels like it was just the other day when I was graduating high school? Time has *flewn* by, and I really can say that I feel I've made the most of these three years at Pepp*. I've done -so much- more thatn I ever dreamed "college" was about when I was in high school. When I thought of college in high school I did't know about opportunities to study abroad (or didn't think about it).. I didn't know that I might be able to do an internship while still completing my degree... I wasn't thinking about waking up every dat to overlook the ocean and have the beach just a mile away.
I really had no idea of what to expect, or any idea of even *where* to go, all I knew was that I had worked hard to have a broad range of opportunities avaiable upon graduating.. now it almost feels like I am in phase II of this cycle, and every time I go to Barnes & Noble I can't help but look at the books about "Getting Into Med School" and other college books... even though I still don't know where I want to go from here.
I honestly have been -very- blessed. It's always been about prayer and following my heart, and whenever I have done that, I really can't say I've ever been led astray. I can't emphasize enough how -happy- I am with my decision to have come to DC. After last semester, potentially one of my most depressing semesters (aside from 2nd semester freshman yr.), when I was in a crisis of killer impossible classes... DC couldn't have come at a better time. I feel so *fulfilled* having come here.. everything I was longing for I have found.. my spirit has been refreshed, and I feel more confident, happy, and excited about life than I have.. ever?
My time is coming to an end here (soon), and I'm finally ready to accept this for what it has been, always know that I can smile back on this time, and move on to whatever lies before me. I have met some of the best people in this program, and moreover at the other univ. I have been attending for concurrent enrollment.

It's so nice to have finals done and be able to relax. I didn't sleep for 48 hours the other day, and it was kind of scary going into my last final, feeling slightly delirious. I remember looking at the last question on the exam, sitting back in my chair as I drank the last of my iced tea.. thinking about how weird it was that I was almost done but couldn't quite get the motivation to *write*.. and finally I just forced myself to write.. finished an hour ahead of time... the cumulative neurosci. wasn't *nearly* as hard as I expected it to be, but then again, that could be relative considering I studied my ass off... a lot of people calculate the score they need to get before taking an exam so that they know how hard they should study.. but I don't because it makes me nervous, and I figure I should always be trying to do my best anyway. There's a crazy story to go along with the finals the other day.. basically I lent my friend a book that was *required* to use for the final because he was leaving for home early and taking the final early.. my friend calls me on the phone and lets me know he'll leave the book in his room so I can get it... .. I go down there 30 min. later, one of his friends tells me he was already there and left for the airport, but I don't see the book.. I ask his roomie if he was in a rush.."yeah he was".. and that's when I KNEW he had taken the book with him by accident. I call him, he apologizes profusely.. but he's at the airport.. he LEAVES the book by a phone book at the airport metro station... I HALL ass over to the metro station.. can't find the book... he calls me at that moment.. turns out he missed his flight and wants me to wait for him.. only thing is now, he left the book and now it's gone... ... ..
to make a long story short.. I didn't have the book, I panicked, I called my friend at univ*.. he tells me to not worry.. that if I go to univ* he'll pick me up by the metro and help me make copies.. and I just wanted to stay there since my final was at 8 in the morning and I couldn't wake up/get on the metro to be there in time for the morning, so I ended up just crashing at his place (not the best way to start before finals begin)... and I didn't get any sleep because I was uncomfortable, but he was so nice.. lol.. made me coffee and biscotti in the morning, I can't complain, he tried his best to be accomodating, annnd I thank him. Not sure how I did on my finals, but I feel particularly good about my neurosci. exam.. not sure about the other research exam. heh. I looked at my overall grade, later, so-far in research methods.. and it was 108.5% (a little extra credit was offered).. .. soo.. unless my final research paper (worth 20%) and my final exam (30%) come back with bad grades, then I should be good. Neurosci. I had an overall 59.9 out of 61 (when she crunched all the numbers and brought it down, that's how it ended up).. so we'll see... the final is 30%.. but I'm really hoping I get two As in my psy. classes. The bitch professor (who made me cry, when classes started), gave me an A- ... that grade already in.... but there's nothing I could do about that, when a paper is worth 50% and I previously had a 95%.. she pisses me off. She gave my friend a B+ .. and he's *really* pissed. We really worked our asses off, but considering I thought I would fail her class, or not be able to get through it... I can't complain too much.. I'm still pissed..

this is all. rambles.